All posts by Phoebe Skg

In previous centuries, religion played a very important role in people’s lives. This happened because people, throughout history and by their nature, look for a connection with something greater than themselves. Something that gives meaning.

Slowly, religion started to lose its popularity and materialism became dominant.

The extreme consumerism of recent years made people more attached to material things.

A large part of the population lost its moral compass, resulting in people functioning like airplanes without a pilot in the cockpit.

The result is less socialization (even though on the internet we have social media) and more unhappiness and mental illnesses.

The lack of a sense of purpose and meaning increases our unhappiness.

In this article we will discuss why having a purpose that is not exclusively about yourself (spiritual health) is important for a balanced life.

First, I should clarify that everything I write on this blog is opinion based on my personal experiences. I do not have any professional or academic connection to mental health.

According to the McKinsey Health Institute:

“Spiritual health encompasses having meaning in one’s life, a sense of connection to something larger than oneself, and a sense of purpose. Finding this meaning is associated with strong mental, social, and physical health.”

https://www.mckinsey.com/mhi/our-insights/in-search-of-self-and-something-bigger-a-spiritual-health-exploration

This of course does not mean that spiritual health is necessarily defined as believing in an organized religion.

Spirituality is believing in a purpose greater than yourself and in some higher power.

A purpose does not need to be something grand. We do not need to change the world or become famous. It can be helping the community, creating art, protecting animals, helping people who face difficulties, or trying to leave the world a little better than we found it. What matters is having something that goes beyond the narrow limits of ourselves and gives us a reason to keep going.

From my personal experience, when I was homeless in Greece, this spiritual part of myself helped me cope with difficulties and remain mentally healthy and balanced.

Even though I do not believe in any religion, my belief in a higher power, in energies, and most importantly in the community and the good sides of human beings, helped me get back on my feet again.

Now I work. I live in the house that I rent and I try as much as I can to contribute positively to society.

That is why I created this blog, as an effort to offer a piece of information or two to my fellow human beings.

The “Monk mode” is something that has been promoted in recent years in self-help coach circles and it can be summarized in the idea that “for someone to succeed, they must remove themselves from every distraction and focus only on their goals.”

This, of course, is something especially problematic as advice.

Let’s see below why it is problematic.

-It is advice that is not for everyone. People who work and have families cannot simply “isolate themselves.” This will create financial and family problems for them.

-It is anti-social advice. Humans are social beings and evolve through society.

As a trans woman and former homeless person, I learned that the biggest advantage is a large and strong support system.

Meaning the people you socialize with.

Even real monks socialize together with other monks. So this is a distortion of monasticism.

-It is a purely materialistic approach and ignores the fact that a human being is also spirit.

It is an approach that increases attachments and the shallowness of the person who follows this advice.

-It increases the risk of developing psychological and physical problems.

As I mentioned above, humans have not evolved to be alone. Loneliness is one of the main indicators that increase the risk of premature death from poor physical health, from suicide, or from poor mental health that leads a person to not take care of themselves.

It would be good not to follow every nonsense that gets uploaded on social media and instead to be there for our fellow human beings. And through giving, we will benefit as well.

When I was sleeping in a homeless shelter, my first goal was to find a job.

Even though deep down, I didn’t like that idea.

I even did volunteer work for NGOs so I could network and have some sense of normalcy in my life.

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Still, the idea of working for someone else for the rest of my life never seemed particularly appealing to me.

But I’m also a realist.

Changing your life and no longer depending on a job takes planning and preparation.

If you’re unemployed right now, don’t even think about trying to live off anything other than a job.

Get a job.

If you’re already working, you should know that it will take years and require sacrifices to achieve it.

Don’t listen to the bs from life coaches and people trying to sell “easy solutions.”

There are no easy solutions.

Everything requires the corresponding investment.

– You can invest money.

– You can invest time.

– If you invest less money, you’ll invest more time.

The first step

First, you need to figure out what genuinely interests you and make sure there’s actually an audience for it.

If people don’t want it and you can’t sell it, then find something else that interests you.

Then invest in it

You may need:

– A website

–Tools (if we’re talking about crafts or physical products)

– Social media accounts

– Brand building

– Marketing

– Time and consistency

After that, whatever you create will need time to build an audience.

Don’t quit too early

Once you see that you’ve stabilized in the market and you’re consistently making:

– Your salary

– Plus your brands expenses

for a reasonable period of time, then you can start thinking about leaving your job.

Anything faster than that is irrational and irresponsible.

Why many self help tips doesn’t work?

Self-help often sounds simple.

Do this. Think like this.

Follow this routine.

And it comes with proof.

-Someone who made it says: Look how I MADE it.

-An influencer who built something.

-Some bro or sis who “figured it out”.

So in first glance it sounds convincing. “If something worked for them and they made it, probably will work for me.

”But there’s a catch“.

You’re often looking at at one good outcome out of many failures.

For every person one advice worked , there are many who tried it with poor results.

Same effort different outcome.

Not because they didn’t try hard enough. But because reality is more complex.

Things like Timing , Environment, Opportunities, personality, psychology, luck, are some variables of the equation.

What worked for one person might be the exact combination of the above variables and yet, it is presented as “the formula for success“.

That’s where self-help becomes misleading. Not because it’s false.

But because it’s incomplete.

In Hustle culture it gets even worse.

It turns personal success (what ever that means)into one-cut advice.

Like one path it’s repeatable for everyone.

But success stories are not instructions.

They are unique outcomes. And outcomes don’t tell you how many others failed.

So instead of asking: “What worked for them?”

Ask: “What works for me in my reality?”

Less copying.

More understanding.

More awareness.

Not every success story is a blueprint.

Sometimes, it’s just an exception that got attention and got viral because it happened to work once.

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Most self-help advice pushes one idea:
avoid stress, stay positive, protect your peace.

Sounds good—but it’s incomplete

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The city hasn’t always been just a place I move through.
At different points in my life, it meant very different things — sometimes survival in the most literal sense (as a homeless), and later, long days working outside in the middle of constant noise, movement, and unpredictability.

So you have to eliminate as many variables as you can

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 Creating a gothic feminine bedroom aesthetic is about blending dark elegance with soft, personal expression. This style combines rich textures, moody color palettes, and carefully chosen decor to transform any space into a mysterious yet inviting retreat.

From black velvet bedding and vintage-inspired mirrors to candlelit corners and subtle spiritual elements, a gothic bedroom captures both strength and softness. Whether you’re redesigning your entire space or adding a few statement pieces, embracing a dark feminine aesthetic allows you to create a room that feels deeply intentional and visually captivating.

If you’re looking for gothic feminine bedroom aesthetic ideas, focus on layering details that enhance both atmosphere and identity. Think moody lighting, dark wall art, and cozy textiles that create depth without overwhelming the space. Incorporating elements like crystals, incense, or antique-style decor can add a subtle spiritual touch while maintaining a cohesive look. These gothic bedroom ideas are not only visually striking but also practical, helping you design a space that reflects your personality while staying functional, comfortable, and effortlessly aesthetic.

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 We’ve always been told that spirituality is about “fitting in” —being soft-spoken, calm, and traditional.

But what if your soul  is louder? What if you’re a misfit?

In”Hard core Zen,” Brad Warner makes a point  that most spiritual books are afraid to make.

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